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Friday, September 14, 2007

Many Rivers To Cross


Conte - 20 mins

Another quick self portrait, this time in Conte.

Self portraits have to be the most demanding subject, especially from life!
While I realise it's only 20 minutes and it is recognisable as me, I see lots wrong and it is far from where I'd like it to be.

How does that make me feel?

Well perhaps it should dent my confidence, create a deep sigh from within, lure me back to my 'safe' zone working portraits from photographs or avoid this area completely...I mean there are heaps of subjects right? Perhaps I should hide my efforts from public eyes, show only my best, it may after all appear that I am reversing rather than plummeting full speed ahead.

No.

It makes me so excited!
I want to share this amazing time in my life, the good, the bad...and in this case...the ugly! There is no shame in learning, at any age, at any stage.

He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
- Chinese Proverb.

No sooner I feel I have achieved another step in my journey...Up pops a river I have to find a way to cross. Art never becomes boring, always a challenge, always something to learn, something to push for. She hands out small rafts from time to time, enough to gently pull us around the river's bend, small acknowledgements for our dedication and then BAM, her current speeds up and we are neck high in white water, spinning, reeling, adrenalin pumping.
What a ride!

I think I may become my new studio challenge. Models are not cheap and, here in the Fens, they are hard to find ...I know...I've been looking for what feels like years!!!
I'm here, I'm free and I'm available when I need me...What more could I ask?

..A bigger mirror perhaps?

Yes, get ready for more of my ugly mug. Who knows, I may even learn to pose without frowning like a 90 year old!

9 comments:

Cathy (Kate) Johnson said...

The mouth is LOVELY, Anita...and yes, that's precisely why I do self portraits. Because not only is it truly demanding and self-revealing, but--I'm free, and I'm here, and I'm willing to pose!

Joan Y said...

I love your post Anita! Your drawing is amazing. I recently did a self portrait of sorts and I realized that I probably see myself very differently from the way others see me and that's the beauty of self-portraits ... to have others experience us the way we do. Looking forward to more images of you! :)

Anita said...

Thankyou Kate...I can't believe it has taken me so long to realise my 'model' potential in the studio...Doh!

Anita said...

Thankyou Joan.
Yes, I think we see ourselves VERY differently than others do.

ujwala said...

nice self portrait. you're looking serious. i find that happens to me too - i look very serious and fatter than i am! i was told that its because of how much we're concentrating on observing.

and i agree. drawing from life after painting from photographs does take you out of your safe zone.

the reason i like making self portraits is that i dont have to worry about likeness at least not much and if i turn out uglier than i am i have no one to blame but me! :D i truly enjoy making these but my family is a bit dismayed at the way they turn out :P

Anita said...

Yes my family often look a little confused by my results. After viewing this one my Dad asked if I really saw myself as THAT old! LOL!
All good practice though.
Thankyou for popping in anf for taking time to leave your comment.

martín.dibujandoarte said...

Hi Anita! It's a great self portrait, like the looseness. By chance during the weekend I've done a self portrait since my partner just bought as mirror at the studio and couldn't help it... It's very interesting to read your thoughts about a self-portrait. great post!

Anita said...

Thankyou Martin, glad you enjoyed the post!

phthaloblu said...

You have a great attitude. Keep going! You already know from experience that practice makes perfect. Yes, I can tell it's you. After all it was only 20 minutes. Can't wait to see what happens in a few months!